I love my family, I love Dash, and the people who have cared so much ever since I was born. I got thinking back to the days when everything was ok. When I wasn't sick, when Mom was still around, and when Dad doesn't work as much. Sometimes, I wonder if nothing ever happened, what would we be doing right now. I don't know why but when the bad things started happening, I just imagined more of what would have happened. Like making a perfect story in my head of nothing going wrong and everyone's happy.

Grandpa told me sometimes, we can't ask for too much and when things happen, we just have to keep going with it. He said the more we complaint the worse things going to get. But sometimes I can't help it. I know I'm sick and sometimes, I wish that Dad would work less to be with me. I wish people around me that I know can take hours or even minutes off their lives to say hi and talk to me for a few. I know people are busy and people got their own things to do, but sometimes, I just wish. I don't know if it's because it's good for me or for them. I feel like if they never get to stop by to say hi or talk to me, when I'm gone they'll regret it and blame themselves for everything they didn't get to do or say. I hate it when people do that, it's sad.

But I guess some people like Dad hae their own way of fixing things. Like working a lot and keeping themselves busy. Then they wouldn't have to think much of anything else but work. I guess that's good too, I don't want people do go crazy because of me. I don't want people to stress too much over me either. But in the same time, I want to feel loved, feel like I belong, like people actually care if I'm here or not.

Maybe people don't care then I won't either.

I had a lot of eposide today and now I'm just so tired so all I did was sat on the couch and did homework all day. Grandpa said it's ok it's going to be there, I just have to feel better then we can go. I'm sitting here then I don't know why I wanted to talk to Xander or Todd and chat but Grandpa said it's late there so they're probably sleeping. I didn't see Aunt Becky or anyone online either and well Grandpa said some people work on Black Friday too. Uncle Keith came back after he said eight hours! He brought a lot of stuff but he didn't let me see what they were. 

Grandma said don't worry she'll make sure we go out on a hike and Dash can come too if he really wants to. I've just been sick and Grandpa doesn't think it's a good idea to go outside so I just stayed inside and mostly on the couch. I couldn't even get in my chair on my own I was so tired and weak.

I had a dream yesterday that this person came in my room and told me to get up and walk with him. I told him I can't walk my legs don't remember how and he said, sure you can and I tried it and I can walk! He said to follow him so I did and he brought me to this new room with a white door and told me to follow him more. I did and when I walked in it was so bright I couldn't open my eyes. Then the man said it's ok you can open them now and I did then this other man told me to hold his hand and that everything is going to be better from now on so I don't have to worry.

Then I woke up. I hope that man waits for Dad to get home, that's my wish now.

I had the best time of my life I think. I woke up early in the morning, had breakfast, took my meds then went out to play and feed the dogs. Then Grandpa took me up in the hills and looked down at the city, it was really cool. We even got to walk these trails that were pretty cool and I didn't even get stuck with my new chair, I love it, it's so cool. Then when we got back to the house, Grandma was already cooking with some people I never met before and then someone told me to get the door. When I opened it, Dash jumpped and put his paws on my lap and gave me the biggest kiss he ever gave me. I missed him so much and I can't believe I got to see him! Then when I look up, I saw my uncle that's in the Air Force and he came back for Thanksgiving! He said he had to go home and pick up Dash first or else he would have been here ealier. I was so happy to see Dash and he was happy to see me too so we went out and played for hours before I started feeling sick so I came back inside and watched some football then climbed in bed and slept for a bit. 

I woke up and then did a bit more homework but I felt really sick so Dash and I slept some more and did more homework. When I woke up again it was already dinner time and a bunch of people were here. Some of my uncle, aunts, and cousins wefre here and some of Grandpa and Grandma's friends. We didn't have tha many people like we did before, but it was still a lot of fun with everyone in the living room eatting dinner and played video games and talked. 

I didn't felt good after that so Grandpa took me back in my room and said if I wanted to my cousins can come and play with me in here. So they came in and we played Monopoly and Wii then we watched Transformers and Iron Man. I took my meds and wasn't feeling right so one of my cousin stayed in the room with me and we hung out and played some card games and he even helped me with my homework.

I don't know but Cousin Nathan reminds me a lot of Todd and Xander, I hope they had a good Thanksgiving. I haven't talked to them in a long time and I hope they're not too busy and they're doing ok. I told Cousin Nathan about everyone I met on Stickam and he said cool and we talked about a lot of different stuff like school, his job, Dad, Uncle John, Tood and Xander and even my chair.

Then he asked me what I would like for Christmas, he can talk to Santa for me. I really don't know what I want, I know I got a wishlist but that's just a wish. He said if I can have just one wish and only wish what would it be. I told him if it's only one wish I would want to be an Army Infantryman like Uncle John. Cousin Nathan asked me why and I said because I want to spend time with the people I care about so much and watch their backs while they watch mine. Cousin Nathan didn't say anything and just smiled.

Dash is sleeping next to me, this is great, I felt like I'm home again but right now it's with a lot of people. Grandma and Grandpa came in my room and made sure I had my meds and shots before Grandpa told me some stories and he said if I feel better tomorrow he will take me and the dogs out sledding. 

I hope I get to, I can't wait to go up the higher in the trail with the dogs and see what Grandpa got to show me. I'm having a lot of fun really, even though I'm not feeling too good. I'm going to sleep for some before we go out and watch the sunrise.

The flight here was fun, some lady took me to the gate and I didn't have to go in line! I went to the otherside and the security guy patted me down and told me if I go through the gate in my chair, it'll start beeping. Then after that, we went towards the gate and waited to get on. I got to go first! I went in and sat in the seat and the Captain came over and talked to me while they took my chair and put it behind the plane. Then we got to MN, I got off last, then waited for the other plane to be ready. After I got on the second plane, I sat next to this Air Force person going home for Thanksgiving, we talked a lot, the guy was really cool and I told him one of my uncle is in the Air Force too. We had fun talking all the way to Alaska.

I got to Alaska around 1500 and waited for Grandpa and Grandma to get here. They even brought Stang, one of their dog with them! After that, we went home and Grandma showed me my room downstairs. I love my grandparents house, it's not too big, not too small and really warm feeling when you get inside. I miss it here so much I'm glad to be back. Then after I put my stuff down, Grandpa said he wanted to show me something so I went to the living room and saw this new chair! Grandpa said I can go anywhere with it, on the snow, grass, anywhere. So I tried it and took it out and we went to go see the dogs. My grandparents have six dogs and they love to go dog sledding. Grandpa said maybe later we can go out sledding or go out to where the cabin is and ice fish and build an igloo. After we played with the dogs, we went back inside and Grandpa told me a couple story about Dad and when he was in the Army. 

  

My new chair from Grandpa!

For dinner, Grandma cooked chicken, mashed pototes, and veggies. I wasn't hungry so I just had some chicken. Then we went out to feed the dogs then watched some TV and then we played Clue and Scrable. Grandpa told me more stories about when he was in the Army and Grandma told me tomorrow someone special will be here and that she knows I don't feel too good so she didn't invite a lot of people. I can't wait for turkey, ham, and pie! Grandma made sure I took my meds and shots before we went and watched Bolt and Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa. It was pretty good, I liked it.

I didn't felt good afterwards so we got some hot coca and went back to the house. Grandpa pushed me to my room and I climbed in bed and did some homework before Grandma came in and gave me a bowl of her homemade soup. I worked on my homework some more then Grandpa told me more stories before I took more meds and shots. 

I had a lot of fun today, tired and Grandpa said it's from the flying but when I'm feeling better and rested, we can go out and have fun outside. I can't wait till we do. Charlie, one of their dogs, is laying on the bed with m right now and keeping me company while I do my homework. I think might go to bed, my head is starting to hurt and I don't feel too good. But I'm too excited to sleep and see who's all going to be here tomorrow for Turkey Day.

Happy Thanksgiving everybody.